There is a dating app for bacon lovers called Sizzl by Oscar Mayer. Yes, you read that right. First, I just want to state that, I have no idea where this bacon boom came from. I grew up in a household where bacon was at every family breakfast after church. Now, you can find Bacon Bloody Mary’s, Bacon Dips, Candied Bacon and a Bacon Dating App. I’m not complaining. But seriously people, bacon isn’t new.
Well, let’s get cooking. I first discovered this app online. Naturally, I had to try it out. Find out what kind of bacon lovers are in my area. Maybe make some friends I can brunch with. Or swap bacon recipes with.
It starts off pretty low-key. Are you male or female? Which sex are you interested in? Then we get to the important questions. Bacon questions. I feel like I’m ordering the perfect piece of bacon. Almost like butterflies in my stomach. Is this what love feels like? I’m on the edge of my chair. What could be the next question? Where is this bacon quest taking me?
More questions. Okay, these are a little harder. I like my bacon crispy, but the ends a little chewy. That’s where the best flavor is! Okay, I’ll go with crispy. The hardest question was to follow. If I’m on a date, and there is only one strip of bacon left, what would I do?
My Minnesota nice says, “Offer them the last piece of bacon, Emily. It’s the right thing to do.” BUT I WANT IT FOR MYSELF. Okay, stay composed. This could be the true test of what kind of person you’re sharing bacon with. If they take the last piece of bacon, throw them to the curb. You don’t need that type of person in your life. Answer: split it. Sadly, you always split it.
Yes! I made it. I answered the important questions. I am now labeled an Oscar Mayer Bacon Lover! A quick “how to use this app” and then it’s time to find my bacon lover. Sizzl is a little classier than swiping left, right or up. Instead, they have a Sizzle-meter. Because why not. AND! This is important, my friends, you can backtrack on a match. Second guessing that X you gave them. Don’t worry. Shake your skillet to add some heat to your Sizzl-meter. I already love everything about this app.
Sadly, six profiles later I ran out of bacon contenders. Come-on Fargo-Moorhead. You’re better than that. You’re true bacon lovers. Show it! The weekend is near. Download this app, and find your perfect bacon match. Or throw some sizzl my way so we can swap bacon recipes.
My name is Emily and I’m a bacon lover. Until next time…stay crispy, my friends.